Thursday, September 1, 2011

The month that always surprises me with its arrival

"Live each season as it passes; breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit, and resign yourself to the influences of each." -- Henry David Thoreau

Hazy days are always a sign...
It is September 1st, 2011. Yes, not rocket science there but hear me out: 95% of the time throughout my life it has surprised me when this month rolls around. There was only one summer to fall transition that I eagerly waited waited for September (that is a story in itself, which I am considering telling one day). 

Of all those other times that I have been caught off guard or in just plain denial, I have grieved over summer departing. Some years it has been worse and others I have managed to go through the transition smoothly. This year, I do have a little ache but mainly because it really hasn't felt like summer. I was gone for two weeks, where oh yes, I did experience heat and sunshine. While I did thoroughly enjoy some of those experiences, it doesn't replace the feeling of summer at home.

Now the light is changing in the sky. Earth is tilting and turning away from that glorious sol...That part does make my heart ache, I have such separation anxiety with that golden delight. This year I am holding on to the fact that the calendar says summer lasts until the 23rd. So I have hope! (Side note- soon we will be having 90 degree weather for a few days so one last hurrah!)

While much of my denial of September is directed at the change of weather, there is much anxiety that comes with this new month. In Oregon and much of the nation, public schools start after Labor Day. There is that sense of the unknown and responsibility that can weigh heavy on one's heart. Newness can be a scary thing at first - like those good ol' elementary days. So many nerve-wracking first days of school!

These days September is a reminder that a long 9-month season is ahead. That means substituting, papers, practicums, college course reading, and various responsibilities. So some of that ache in my heart is just the feeling of losing a bit of freedom. Though ironically, I gain freedom in another way: financial. I wouldn't say that money wins in this case, but simply to say: everything comes with its own set of challenges...

On another note- this month is incredibly emotional for so many people in the United States and in the world. Hard to believe that on the 11th, it will be 10 years since those horrific terrorist attacks.

With all that said, those are my thoughts for the first day of September... Hope all of you are smoothly transitioning into this next part of the year. :)

P.S. I am sure that this blog title is my longest! haha

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