Friday, July 16, 2010

Friendships

"You can't stay in your corner of the Forest waiting for others to come to you. You have to go to them sometimes." --Winnie the Pooh

In light of some recent events, I feel that is time to write about friendships. I have been refraining from writing on this topic too soon as my cousin recently wrote about it. But, I just can't wait any longer!

I think there is something unique that happens in the summer. Summer is a time of transition. Relationships of all kinds change... Maybe it's the people that change. I honestly don't know. Another speculation I have is that summer is also just a great time for reflection, which is simply what I am doing now.

When I think about it, I am kind of amazed at all of the friendships I have had in my life. Some friendships are still going strong and blossoming with each season. Others have fluttered away like the fall leaves drifting in the wind-- like that, they're gone. And other friendships have ended (or will end) for a reason; because I cut them off or they weren't meant to be. Lots of changes. Lots of learning.

While losing a friend is never an easy process, I have learned that often times it is good in the long-term. In those times I have learned more about myself and what I value in a friendship/relationship. For example, I have no tolerance for those that do not put in any effort into the relationship. I feel that in order for a relationship to be successful, it takes two people putting in the effort and energy. When you put in the effort to something it shows that you care-- it is an active process. Effort keeps the relationship alive.

To this end, that has been one major factor in how I determine whether or not I remove someone from the ties of friendship. Believe me, I work extremely hard in my friendships. They are not something I take lightly-- I do everything I can before deciding to end them. However, as I have learned, sometimes people are just passing through. Not every friendship can be life-long. Regardless of how long a friendship is meant to last I believe they shouldn't be treated as though they are temporary.

While only time can tell whether a friendship is life-long, I feel so blessed for the ones I have in my life now. I am so blessed for my close friends (some of which are family), the ones here and those far away. I feel confident in the fact that I will have these certain friendships for years to come. They all bring so much joy to my life and I have learned so much from them. The future ahead is questionable and unwritten, no telling what will happen. I have no idea who I will meet and what other friendships I will form. For those that I hold dear know this: I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart).... *

*E.E. Cummings

3 comments:

Janelle said...

Amen!

Carol likes to say something to the effect of, "God puts people in your life for a time, a season, or forever." Sometimes the hardest part is to recognize when a "time," or a "season," is over.

Elizabeth said...

Enjoyed the post. However what I have learned is its okay to let those friendships go, but don't be surprised that a few of those that seem to have ended will returned. God uses all of us for reasons and some people will return to your life either for you to touch their lives or for them to touch yours. Its hard to let go and let live, but sometimes its the best thing for both. I think one thing is just being aware when relationships are changing and let them head in the directions that are needed at that time. Hope that makes sense. Love ya!

Angela said...

Elizabeth,

Thank you for bringing up that topic-- it is true sometimes we do just have to let friendships go. I didn't really cover that aspect of it too much. You're right God uses people to teach us things in life and to mold us and shape us to how He wants us. :)

Love ya too!